Mr H tells me everyone should have a husband like him, but not being one to lavish praise when it is openly being sought I reply, I'll put you on the market to the highest bidder then! He laughs as I deliver my new teeth whitened grin.
Laughter is the sunshine at home, tease is a cat and mouse game we play; any hints for praise are smashed back like a ball on a bat until we run out of breath. Its the small things that matter; when Mr H walks through the door on a cold winters evening I try to ensure there is steam on the windows! The pans are on the cooker, or on low energy days, the microwave is buzzing. When I worked long days in Wales often driving back in the dark; the sight of Mr H's steam, made me skip through the door.
Mr H and I are attached by many strings; an hour or two with binoculars dangling from our necks keeps us sane, we cannot pass a book shop and have to restrict our visits to heavenly Hay on Wye since our house already trembles underneath the weight of our books. Dancing lessons have been replaced by evenings snuggled up with a film from our DVD library. We garden and grow together and if my battery is flat I orchestrate and entertain from my deck chair.
He is a man that does, on cruises he plods off to wash and iron in the laundry and I laugh when he pulls stories out of his newly ironed shirt pockets; an argument about washing removed too soon, ladies moaning that their husband would never iron a shirt; more fool you ladies I say. Sometimes I go to stand and watch, I may even lift the iron! He carries my bags, silently proffers his arm when we reach steps, holds the door open for me to get in the car or walk through a door.
Yet we are both as stubborn as weeds pushing up through the soil, our minds clash like swords in a duel, weeks are littered with arguments but sulking is rare. Mr H has learnt to apologise even if I am wrong! Praise comes often, Mr H is better than me. He was the first man to tell me I am beautiful, I still don't believe him. I tell him I have enriched his life!
I was able to offer a mind of support when Mr H studied for his Masters Degree, bouncing ideas around coffee shop walls, proof reading chapters. He trusts my opinion. I even got a mention in his final dissertation:
Finally I need to recognise the unique support and encouragement that has come from my special wife Dawn. Her gentle and singular example of determination and struggle against profound challenges has made me recognise the importance of never letting go of your hopes and plans. I am indeed blessed to have someone who never stops giving so much of herself to others despite the huge losses and sacrifices she has had to endure.
Getting to know someone, soul-side and warts can be a slow business and our walk of discovery continues. Indefinitely I hope. One friend talking to another says there is someone out there for everyone. I believe that too. I am lucky I have found my someone.
